Monday Motivator: Refuse Other People’s Anger

One of the best things about my job is the chance to do research and the resulting serendipitous finds that happen when I’m looking up something. A search on anger management lead me to an article on a Buddhist approach to anger. The author pointed out that we should show compassion for the angry person, but we should also show compassion for ourselves and not take on that anger.

Of course, that is easier said than done. Many of us, when facing an angry person, feel the need to retaliate, to “give as good as we’re getting.” But usually, an angry encounter makes everyone feel worse, does little for our health, and seems to hang about for hours afterwards.

So, often, the best response is simply not to respond to anger. That doesn’t mean you have to cower in fear in front of the angry person. If the person has a legitimate problem, deal with the problem, not the anger. And, unless your job requires you to, there is no rule that says you have to stay around and listen to someone’s rants. You can simply walk away.

So this week’s motivator is simply this:  You don’t have to be angry just because someone else is. They may have the right to express their anger. You definitely have the right to refuse to let it affect your day.

 

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